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Hypnotherapy for Anxious Attachment

Do you fear abandonment or rejection, causing you to cling to your partner tightly? Do you often need constant reassurance in your relationships? Do you overanalyse interactions with your romantic interest and worry excessively about the next time you’ll speak or see each other?

Anxious attachment, also known as preoccupied attachment, is often characterised by a deep fear of abandonment and an intense need for validation and closeness in relationships. Individuals with anxious attachment frequently feel insecure and constantly seek reassurance from their partners to alleviate their fears.

Research suggests that around 20% of the population experiences anxious attachment, making it a relatively common phenomenon. However, despite its prevalence, anxious attachment can significantly disrupt one’s ability to form and maintain healthy relationships.

Fortunately, attachment patterns are not permanent conditions, and how you relate to yourself and others can change. Hypnotherapy can be a valuable approach to help you explore your attachment patterns and overcome anxious attachment so you can feel secure in your relationships. By tapping into the unconscious mind, hypnotherapy aims to uncover and reframe deep-seated beliefs and fears that contribute to attachment anxiety.

Remember, you are worthy of love and security, and you deserve relationships that nurture and support your growth. By taking proactive steps towards healing, you can break free from anxious attachment and create healthier, more fulfilling connections with yourself and others.

couple holding hands in front of a body of water with nature in the distance

What are attachment styles?

Understanding attachment styles can provide valuable insight into our relationship patterns and offer a roadmap for personal growth and healing.

Secure attachment

Individuals with secure attachment have a strong sense of trust, comfort with intimacy, and the ability to communicate needs and emotions effectively in relationships. They feel confident in their worthiness of love and support and can navigate challenges in relationships with resilience and empathy. Approximately 50% of the population experiences secure attachment.

Insecure attachment — anxious, avoidant, and disorganised

Anxious attachment is a form of insecure attachment. Other insecure styles include avoidant and disorganised attachment. Those with an avoidant attachment may struggle with intimacy and vulnerability, often withdrawing or distancing themselves when faced with emotional intimacy. Individuals who experience disorganised attachment may exhibit a mix of anxious and avoidant behaviours, oscillating between seeking closeness and withdrawing due to fear of rejection or harm.

Symptoms of anxious attachment

Recognising the symptoms of anxious attachment is the first step towards addressing it. Some common signs include:

  • Constantly seeking validation and reassurance from those you are connected to romantically, including your partner or people you are dating

  • Feeling intense anxiety or fear when your romantic interest or partner is not available

  • Overanalysing situations and interpreting innocent actions as signs of rejection

  • Difficulty trusting your partner’s intentions, leading to jealousy and possessiveness

  • Fear of being alone or abandoned, even in healthy relationships

These symptoms often manifest in relationship challenges, such as frequent arguments, emotional volatility, and difficulty establishing boundaries. Anxious attachment can also contribute to a cycle of relationship insecurity, where the fear of abandonment leads to clinginess and dependency, further pushing the partner away.

Impact on your well-being

The impact of anxious attachment extends beyond just relationship dynamics. It can profoundly affect an individual’s emotional well-being and overall quality of life. Constantly living in fear of rejection or abandonment can lead to:

  • Chronic stress and anxiety

  • Low self-esteem and low self-worth

  • Difficulty focusing on other aspects of life due to preoccupation with relationships

  • Social withdrawal, isolation, and a feeling of loneliness

  • Patterns of self-sabotage in relationships due to fear of intimacy

woman holding a man's hand

How to overcome anxious attachment with hypnotherapy

Hypnotherapy is a type of therapy that uses hypnosis and talk therapy to help you achieve a state of relaxation and increased suggestibility. During a hypnotherapy session, a hypnotherapist may use various techniques to help you address your particular attachment patterns and develop ways to form healthier and more functional bonds with others.

Through guided relaxation and suggestion, hypnotherapy can help individuals:

  • Identify and challenge negative thought patterns related to attachment

  • Cultivate a sense of security and self-assurance independent of external validation

  • Develop coping strategies to manage anxiety and fear of abandonment

  • Foster a deeper understanding of attachment dynamics and healthier relationship behaviours

Hypnotherapy offers a safe and relaxing approach to healing. It allows individuals to explore and process their emotions in a supportive environment. By promoting relaxation and reducing stress, hypnotherapy helps individuals access a state of heightened receptivity, making it easier to implement positive changes in thought patterns and behaviour.

What happens during a hypnotherapy session?

During a hypnotherapy session, a trained hypnotherapist will guide the client into a state of hypnosis and use suggestions and guided visualisation techniques. Hypnotherapy can help people overcome a variety of issues in addition to attachment issues, including relationship difficulties and sexual issues. Additionally, hypnotherapy can be used to effectively treat anxiety, depression, anger, low self-confidence, and sleep problems.

Image by Masha S

Hypnotherapy for anxious attachment

Overcoming anxious attachment can feel like an insurmountable obstacle, but healing is possible with the proper support and approach. Hypnotherapy offers a unique and effective path towards overcoming attachment anxiety, helping individuals cultivate a greater sense of security, self-confidence, and fulfilment in their relationships.

Francesca Sciandra

Hypnotherapy for people seeking transformative healing and change

Francesca Sciandra, Integrative Therapist, Psychotherapeutic Counsellor & Hypnotherapist

References

Levine, A. and Heller, R. (2010). Attached: The New Science of Adult Attachment and How It Can Help You Find - And Keep - Love. Tarcherperigee.